iPad Apps for India

Visit the App Store and there are hundreds of apps. But how many of these are relevant to our culture? Are you really going to cook Jamie Oliver recipes or read the e-book of War and Peace? Perhaps not. Let’s look at some apps that make sense to us.

The Shastri-Gavaskar App
Type in any forthright comment about cricket and this cleans it into a BCCI certified version of the same. Free with this is the Tendlya-Mancrush App which plays romantic music mixed with heavy breathing and occasional panting whenever Tendulkar is at the crease. $ 0.50

Customer reviews

Akash Sharma. ****
This is awesome. Check it out. I typed in “The Indian test team are a bunch of overpaid, inbred louts”. What I get is “The Indian test team is perfectly balanced”. Stalin is smiling in his grave.

The Bollywood Remix Song App
Takes any old Hindi song from your iTunes library, adds a base track of pulsating beats (doof-doof-doof-doof) and intersperses Jamaican patois/ rap in it to make your own Bollywood remix! FREE

Customer reviews

Cool_GuyDelhi *****
Gm 2 all ma sweet frnzzz…ve a gr8 day.. Njoy

Abhishek Dutta ****
gud one

Sahil Tyagi *****
kya gazab ka app hai bhai!!!

The Delhi Belly App
Been eating too much clean food? Missing out on Medical Leave?
This app ties in the GPS functions of your phone to show you those gastronomic hotspots in Delhi where you are guaranteed E-Coli, Gastritis or Hep B that can lay you low for a week. $ 1.50

Customer reviews

Richa Shreshta ****
Brilliant. It showed me some places in West Delhi that can effectively counter vaccines!

Alok Ranjan *****
I used to have conscience issues fabricating excuses to skive off work but now those days are gone.

Ajay Prajapati *****
This thing is super effective. I went in search of a simple flu and ended up with Small Pox. 6 months quarantine!! Yay!

The Ridiculous Nickname Maker App
If you were born in India and you don’t have a corny ‘house-name’, you’re probably adopted. Tonu, Sonu, Babloo, Chinkoo, Lolo? No? Tch Tch. This app finds an appropriate cheesy Indian nickname for you, based on your given name, state of origin and level of ridiculousness desired. $ 0.50

Customer reviews

Gumpoo *
Nonsense app. We have been given good names by our parents only. Why are we buying the apps for this?

The Tax Loopholes App
Self-interest is our national sport and we’d be rotten Indians if we gave the government its rightful due. This app finds all the loopholes in our tax system and generates a to-do list of activities based on your particular profession and income level. Get ready to buy some ‘farm land’. $ 3.50

Customer reviews

Krishna Desai ***
I have heard many people saying that India is not developing or is very slowly developing. Those who believe this should again give a thought to it. What an idea sirji.

NetJobs4All *****
!!!!!!!!!!!!!Work from Homedoing data entry jobs!!!! Earn $1000-2000 USD/month!!!!! No investment!!!!!!!!!!!! Free Training.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Rape Whistle App
This is the must-have app of the season, especially if you reside in the NCR region. It’s a pretty straightforward app, does what it says. There are two settings, manual and automatic. The manual one is free. The automatic version is iPhone only as it requires body contact to detect minute changes in body temperature and adrenaline levels that correlate to the body’s flight-or-fight responses and triggers a high-pitched whistle. Automatic Version $4.00

No customer reviews so far

The Bribe Calculator App
Traffic cops, registrar of marriages, the gas connection guy, excise – how do you decide how much to bribe in each instance? Fret not. Your worries are over. The Bribe Calculator App has been scientifically developed after interviews with over 5000 government employees and 7000 unscrupulous businessmen across the four metros. It even includes the correct bribe glossary in different states. Examples, ‘Kharcha-paani’ in Mumbai becomes ‘Adjustment’ in Bangalore. Between $0.50 to $16.00 (negotiable)

No customer reviews so far

The Google Nosey Neighbour App
This app uses Google Maps to identify your neighbourhood and sets up Google alerts for all your neighbours and prepares weekly bulletins with all their activity on FB, Twitter and the internet in general. Being a Google app, this is still in the Beta testing phase and you can’t download it unless someone invites you to the download page.

Customer reviews

Swaroop Dev **
What do you think? Here to stay, or another Buzz/Wave?

Vikas Rawat ***
The interface is quick, really well done. I love the integration with the other Google tools I use, like Gmail and Reader.

Help The MBA Challenged App
We live in an age where unfortunately a lot of young people are afflicted by MBAs. It is a chronic condition that causes early onset of dementia, stunted emotional growth that can result in borderline intellectual functioning, repressed sexual behaviour and in some cases even anxiety attacks. In some countries people cross the road to avoid them and children throw rocks at them. This app helps the MBA challenged cope with the real world. Helps them through basic human interactions, greetings, responses and makes them productive citizens of society.

Customer reviews

Periyaswamy Ellappan *****
App of the Year, for me.

Ankita Mittal *****
How wonderful and humane of you to do something like this. God bless you.

Shubham Bhatkande ****
Touching. Best use of technology!